What is preventing me from getting better?
The first answer that always crops up is the past.
So much happened to me before I was twenty. I have spent my adult life with PTSD.
This is the main difficulty holding me back. I have bad memories, grief, a sense of loss. I have nightmares every night.
If I could have proper rest, things might be different.
If I had good memories.
I did not put down foundations in my formative years, I was too busy being bombarded by things, reacting to events.
I have discovered that you do need those formative years. They are important, and can help you as an adult.